The Witch Trials: A Cautionary Event

My older sister sent me the following essay, which echoes my own thoughts.  I was going to write something on Franken, including the mention of our great great great grandfather, but she did it first, as always.  So here it is. 

Our country is devolving into what could potentially become a culture of mass hysteria. I'm referring specifically to the “Me Too” movement on social media. We are undergoing a period of intense stress and fear, and I believe we should be very careful.

My ancestor, Andrew Eliot, was a juror at the Salem witch trials and was responsible, along with the other jurors, for the execution of over 20 innocent women. For this reason, I am especially on the alert when I see evidence of mass hysteria and the punishment of individuals for alleged deeds that are committed years before what might be an irrational phenomenon.

Andrew Eliot, a humble cordswainer and respected citizen in the Salem area, along with his fellow jurors, later apologized:

 We confess that we ourselves were not capable to understand, nor able to withstand the mysterious delusions of the powers of darkness and prince of the air, but were for want of knowledge in ourselves and better information from others, prevailed with to take up with such evidence against the accused as on further consideration and better information, we justly fear was insufficient for the touching the lives of any, Deuteronomy 17.6, whereby we fear we have been instrumental with others, though ignorantly and unwittingly, to bring upon ourselves and this people of the Lord, the guilt of innocent blood, which sin the Lord saith in Scripture, he would not pardon, 2 Kings 24.4, that is we suppose in regard of His temporal judgments. We do, therefore, hereby signify to all in general (and to the surviving sufferers in especial) our deep sense of and sorrow for our errors in acting on such evidence to the condemning of any person.

 And do hereby declare that we justly fear that we were sadly deluded and mistaken, for which we are much disquieted and distressed in our minds, and do therefore humbly beg forgiveness, first of God for Christ's sake for this our error. And pray that God would not impute the guilt of it to ourselves nor others. And we also pray that we may be considered candidly and aright by the living sufferers as being then under the power of a strong and general delusion, utterly unacquainted with and not experienced in matters of that nature. We do heartily ask forgiveness of you all, whom we have justly offended and do declare, according to our present minds, we would none of us do such things again on such grounds for the whole world, praying you to accept of this in way of satisfaction for our offense, and that you would bless the inheritance of the Lord that He may be entreated for the land.” 

Foreman, Thomas Fisk,Thomas Perly Senior,William Fiske, John Peabody, John Batcheler,Thomas Perkins, Thomas Fisk, Junior, Samuel Sather, John Dane, Andrew Elliott [sic] Joseph Evelith, Henry Herrick, Senior

 From "The Apology of the Salem Jury," 1697.

This apology has taught me that any of us, in any place or time, could be carried away by fears that are increased by lies and worse.  It deserves reprinting.

I was a hearing officer with the Connecticut Department of Labor, had occasion to hear a few sex harassment and discrimination cases. Although I was sympathetic to the women who complained, having had some nasty incidents myself in previous employment, my job was to develop accurate and objective findings of fact before making a legal decision as to whether she quit her job for reasons attributable to the employer that would qualify her for unemployment benefits. I had a memorable case in which a woman accused her boss of sexual harassment, and it turned out that she exaggerated some minor incidents, which were disproved by credible testimony from her former co-workers. As it happened, she quit her job because she did not want to share her commission on a sale with another (female) coworker who closed the sale. I found she left for reasons that were not attributable to the employer. Privately, I was astounded that someone would cruelly go to those lengths to cause unbearable stress to a man and his family out of revenge and in order to receive unemployment benefits.

So, I am very disturbed when I see evidence of other motives behind some of the complaints of sexual harassment. This is not meant to be critical of women who have had legitimate experiences of sexual abuse that have damaged their lives and who have had the courage to speak up, but we must be very careful in our accusations so that the consequences of a man's sexual behavior fits its actual intent and effects on a woman.

As a connection to the witch trials I found an email in reddit.com/r/history submitted a year ago about the effect of ergot, a mold-like substance on rye wheat that supposedly caused the weird behavior of the supposed victims in Salem:

“Just finished my thesis on the Salem Witch Trials. The Ergot thing was disproven decades ago. One of the most damning facts was that "witches" didn't just come from Salem, they came from all of the surrounding towns and villages in that county as well. Most likely the accusations were the product of a sue happy culture using the moment to settle old scores. For instance the Putnam family accused a man hundreds of miles away simply because he owed them money. The first afflicted girls who blamed Tituba later admitted they were bored. Tituba was an easy target since she was a slave and a Native American.”

I therefore urge that we all do detective work and turn ourselves into fact-finders, using reliable sources — and carefully, dispassionately evaluate the evidence before ruining the lives of decent people and rewarding those who would destroy them for political reasons and profit.

Lee Ellen Terry

A Modest Proposal for Solving Every National Problem

Olds talk about ice the way younger people talk about nuclear war or Trumpeteers talk about Muslim immigrants.  "You don't know when it will hit you.  You walk out your door in the morning and woosh you're down.  Then you're done." And don't get me started about Stair Terror. We tip toe down one step at a time, each tread a threat to our lives.  So, the real, deep question is: what the hell are we afraid of?  Death?  Please.  My favorite mother-in-law at 90 slipped in her shower and died.  We were very sad, but other than the very rare "she died peacefully in her sleep", that was a good way to go out.

So, I had a thought: the solution to our health care mess, a way to revolutionize our armed services, and a method for dramatically reducing costs all in one fell swoop (pun).  Draft everyone over 65 into the military. It is incredibly sad to lose young people who have their whole lives in front of them.  But how unhappy are we really when an ice shard carrying wrinklers sinks into the sea.  "Well, they had their lives.  Thank god there were no kids skating near by."

In my plan, youngsters would no longer be eligible for the military but could stay at home and screw up their lives without government interference (wouldn't Republicans like that?).  If the rare youth still wanted to do something serviceable, our country could maintain a national reserve, but only for helping hurricane victims or getting kittens out of trees.

So how would this work? First, the modern gender-blind army makes this possible. Weapons aren't as heavy as they used to be and no one marches anymore, as far as I can tell from watching television.  Soldiers ride in big armored vehicles, and a lot of the fighting is done remotely. As for flying planes, much of this is done automatically, and, if not, I'm sure plenty of Olds would love to be fighter jockeys (is that the word?).  Olds can do all those things, maybe not as efficiently or quickly as the young people, but we'd get the job done eventually.  And if/when we become gaga, the Army can pat us on the back and set us off to wander along mine-filled roads or into villages where snipers watch from second-floor windows. As for casualties, there are so many of us that the country could experience very heavy losses and still have plenty of grunts to fill in the gaps.

Second, we would save our national economy.  The country already pays for our health care and our social security, and once our mass induction was implemented, that cash would pass into the defense budget. The costs to the military wouldn't increase with the sudden influx of us old-comers, because we'd be swapping out the kids.  And because there would be no families to support, the defense budget might actually decline.  In addition, most nursing homes would become obsolete, eliminating many Medicaid dollars. Taxes would go down!! Mexico wouldn't have to pay for the wall! All the cash now earmarked for entitlement programs could be spent on fixing the infrastructure, paying for college, improving education, supporting child care programs -- in general making the lives of young people better instead of sending them off to be wounded or killed in terrible places or facing life-long trauma after seeing their friends murdered and murdering others. 

And what joy for us Olds.  We would be serving our country. Our old age would have a purpose. We wouldn't have to worry about our kids supporting us.  The military would only need to provide therapists to help us dig into our memories and recover the courage we had in our youth.  The reckless joy in climbing rocks and trees, of skiing down hills where we shouldn't, of going into caves, of riding between subway cars.  We would need to reawaken the young criminal instincts that made violence appealing, which receded with hormone levels or were shoved back into our subconscious. Olds made young again.

And imagine the telegram. "We regret to inform you that your Granny died trying to save her comrades by walking unarmed into enemy fire." Certainly a better ending then, "We regret to inform you that your Granny died slipping downstairs because she was only wearing her socks."